Writing: WALT Add Detail

In Nic's writing group we have been learning to add detail in our stories. Adding detail is when writers use their 5 senses (sight, touch, smell, taste, hear) along with action senses (such as feel, do, say, think).

 I try to explain it like this: a paragraph is like a puzzle; every sentence is a different piece of the puzzle. When you have a range of 'detailed' sentences, you complete the puzzle. If you repeat using the same puzzle pieces, it gets boring for the reader.  Make sense?

We did an activity today so we could see if we had a range of puzzle pieces in our paragraphs.  We used this colour key:

Then I went through my first paragraph to see if I have a range of "puzzle pieces". 

Some of us realised that we only had 1 or 2 different colours.  So our goal is to add at least 3 more.  Try to have 5 per paragraph.  Here is a before and after photo of Jade's writing after we re-crafted it using the detail scaffold. It's awesome!

#writingedchat use a paragraph prompt to add detail to your writing @tribeoflearners #sharedwriting pic.twitter.com/GYJXMgG4vK
— fuse711 (@fuse711) August 1, 2014